How to cope when you are thrown a curve ball
With 4 days to go until school summer holidays start, I am getting a little nervous!!! I have recently started a new contract and to add something else into the mix we start a long awaited extension on our house any day!! arrrggghhhhh
When I was on the unit today - there was a very new mum who had her little boy yesterday and she was very understandably in a daze!
It made me start thinking about what is best to do in theses situations. I am a planner and I like to be organised so these types of situations where you are totally out of control are not comfortable for me and I can quickly become frustrated and when in hospital very upset and down. So I thought it might be useful to share some of the coping mechanisms we used to get us through some long stays in hospital;
Agree a time when your partner is going to arrive at the hospital so you know when to expect them (Partner be on time!!)
Try and have some structure to the day - so let family know when rounds are and ask them to avoid this - our day would be, husband arrived, I would shower and change into clothes he brought from home, consultant rounds, get some food then we would have a family visit in the afternoon at a time we would specify, my husband did a great job of managing everyones expectations and letting them short visits worked better for me, then a bit of time just the 3 of us. He and I would then work out what I/baby needed for the following day and he would go home to try and rest.
This worked for us and gave me some structure and control - in a situation where things change all the time!
Hopefully these tips might help someone else
What I didn't do was allow anyone else to help - which was just the way I reacted - everyone is different, but I would say let people help and be specific with the help you need - 'Mum, could you do my hospital washing for me and bring in.......' People want to help but if you don't tell them what help you need, it can be very frustrating when they do things that in your befuddled mind is NOT helpful and maybe even a hinderance.